Welcome to Loved By Grace's Life Tools

Healing begins with a decision. But when you're lying in bed, unable to lift your head, and the world outside seems to move forward without you, how do you decide? How do you find the will to even think about healing, much less begin it?

I remember the moment when I decided I was going to heal, no matter what. It wasn’t a grand moment of inspiration or clarity—it was a quiet, determined decision to choose to heal. It didn’t matter if I couldn’t get out of bed. It didn’t matter if I could barely hold my head up for a minute. I had to decide to heal.

For me, this meant something deeper than just a positive mindset. It meant learning to support my nervous system. Because until my body felt safe—until my nervous system was given what it needed—it couldn’t move. The trauma I had carried for years was still trapped in my body, keeping me stuck.

One of the pivotal moments in my healing journey came when I transitioned from a regular bed and mattress to using a PEMF mat (Pulsed Electromagnetic Field). This mat, which cost me just under $1,200, became my new foundation. I slept on it 24/7 for the first year of my healing. And that was the moment I felt a noticeable shift in my recovery. The reason for this wasn’t just the physical act of resting—it was that I was finally putting my body into a healing environment.

This wasn’t just about mindset anymore. This was about giving my body the optimal conditions to heal—and that includes creating a safe, nurturing space for the body to truly regenerate. Rest, when coupled with the right environment, becomes a sacred practice.

Purpose: To help the reader understand the power of choosing to heal, even when the body feels like it’s doing nothing but resting.

Key Insights:

• Healing Is a Choice: At your lowest, when you feel like nothing is moving, the first step is deciding that you want to heal. It doesn’t matter if you can only lift your head for a minute—each second you decide to heal, you’re giving your body the message that it’s time to shift.
   
• From Victim to Creator: It’s so easy to feel like a victim when everything around you keeps going, but you’re stuck. The world moves on while you’re in bed, and the isolation can feel unbearable. But there’s a shift that happens when you stop seeing yourself as a victim and start seeing yourself as someone who is choosing to heal. Even in stillness, healing is happening.
   
• This Is Your Path: Everyone’s healing journey looks different, and that’s okay. You have to trust your unique path—honor the stillness and the small steps, and know that even in your stillness, movement is happening. You are reclaiming your power by choosing healing, no matter how small the steps feel.
   
• Creating a Healing Environment: One crucial element in my journey was the PEMF mat. I realized that my body needed more than just rest—it needed to be in a healing environment. By using the mat, I was providing my body with the kind of energy support it needed to heal. This was the shift from just “resting” to truly nurturing my body with the right energy and space.
   

Purpose: To help the reader understand the importance of deep, intentional rest, especially for the nervous system.

Key Insights:

• Rest Is Sacred: During times of deep illness, we are taught that rest is laziness, but when you’re battling ME/CFS, rest is essential. It is not optional—it is the foundation of your healing. Your body needs rest to reset, repair, and recharge.
   
• Your Nervous System Needs Deep Compassion: ME/CFS is often a reflection of a nervous system that has been overwhelmed for too long. When you allow yourself intentional rest, you’re not just giving your body a break; you’re telling your nervous system, “You are safe. I’m listening to you.”
   
• Rest as the Ultimate Environment for Healing: I’ve learned that rest is not just about doing nothing. Rest, when practiced with intention and in the right environment, becomes a powerful healing tool. It’s not just about the act of lying down—it’s about creating a space where your body feels safe to let go. Using tools like a PEMF mat helped me put my body in a healing environment. The energy from the mat helped my cells recharge and repair at a level that normal rest alone couldn’t.

Purpose: To explore how healing past trauma is critical for ME/CFS recovery and how this ties into nervous system regulation.

Key Insights:

• Trauma Trapped in the Body: The body holds trauma, and for many with ME/CFS, unresolved trauma becomes trapped in the nervous system. When we don’t consciously release this, our bodies stay in a constant state of fight or flight, keeping us stuck in exhaustion and pain.
   
• Creating Safety: Healing trauma starts with creating safety in the body. For me, this was the most crucial turning point—when I started giving my nervous system what it needed, it began to heal. The feeling of safety, of being seen and heard by myself, was what allowed my body to finally release the tension that had been built up over the years.
   
• The Healing Power of a Nurturing Space: By creating a physically supportive environment—like using the PEMF mat—combined with trauma healing practices, I began to nurture my body in a way that was never possible before. The healing was holistic, addressing both the emotional and the physical needs of my body.
   

Purpose: To guide the reader in creating a space where their nervous system can truly begin to heal.

Key Insights:

• Healing Happens in the Stillness: For those of us bound to bed, it can feel like nothing is moving. But in reality, healing happens in the stillness. It happens when you finally give your body the time, the space, and the safety it needs to heal.
   
• Nervous System Rebalancing: As you begin to feel more connected to your body, it’s important to practice the art of nervous system regulation. This might mean learning how to engage in deep breathing, using affirmations, or gently stretching. It means not pushing your body beyond what it can handle, but listening to its cues.
   
• Tools of Healing: The addition of the PEMF mat was an essential part of my healing, as it allowed me to support my nervous system while in bed. Whether it’s through the use of PEMF or another tool, creating an environment that facilitates healing—physically and energetically—is an essential part of the journey.

Purpose: To help the reader accept that healing is a slow, nonlinear journey and that they must trust the process.

Key Insights:

• Healing Is Not Linear: There will be days when you feel better, and days when you feel worse. Healing is not linear, and that’s okay. What matters is that you stay the course and trust that every moment of rest, every gentle movement, is leading you toward healing.
   
• Honoring Your Pace: You must trust your body’s pace, not anyone else’s. Just because the world keeps moving doesn’t mean you must match its pace. Healing from ME/CFS is about moving at the speed your body needs to recover.
   
• The Role of the Healing Environment: Trusting the process also means trusting that every tool, like the PEMF mat, every practice, and every choice you make, is part of the journey. The path to healing doesn’t always look like we expect, but with each step, you are getting closer to a place of health, peace, and vitality.

You are healing. The journey is slow, but it is a journey toward freedom, peace, and vitality. By choosing to heal, by giving your nervous system the rest and compassion it needs, and by creating an environment for healing—whether it’s through tools like the PEMF mat or other supportive practices—you are moving towards a new way of being—a way where your body feels safe, your nervous system is calm, and your soul is finally able to heal the deep wounds that have kept you stuck for so long. Keep trusting, keep resting, and keep healing.